Build Your Leaders

Postcard from Asheville

December 2013


One of my favorite exercises for new clients is to find their power words. These are the words that remind us of the innate power within us.

Our inner dialogue determines, in large part, how effectively we operate in the world. Words lead to thoughts, thoughts to emotions, and emotions to energy. One way to raise that energy and “stand in our power by becoming the full expression of all we are” is to tap into our power words.

Power words can change depending on where we are in our lives. In the past, mine have included authenticity, wisdom, awe, and gratitude.  Recently, I’ve been exploring the potency behind a word that most don’t associate with power: innocence.

By getting in touch with my—and others’—innocence, I am discovering a connectedness that I’ve never experienced before. Additionally, I’m learning to forgive myself and love those parts of myself that I previously found shameful. I am also learning to love even the most difficult people in my life.

When we are wounded, we lose touch with our innocence. Innocence doesn’t go anywhere; it is a part of our most authentic self. We just lose sight of it. When we become reacquainted with innocence, we become reconnected with our essence. Our innocence and wholeness are the same.

I’ve written that one of my core wounds is a limiting belief that I don’t belong. While it’s not apparent to most, I often feel like an outsider. For years, I’ve struggled with this false idea, but it wasn’t until I was able to see myself as that wounded little boy who always felt like an outsider in his family that I could find empathy for myself and begin to heal this damage. I placed a photo of myself as a seven year old boy on my altar to remind me of my innocence.

When I am in a primary relationship, I ask for a photo of my partner as a child. Again, it helps remind me of his innocence. And when someone begins to “work my last nerve,” I picture him or her as a young child who is crying out to be loved.

Paul Ferrini in his book,Embracing Our True Self, goes so far as to suggest, “The Spiritual quest—the search for purpose and meaning—must be understood then as a journey to reclaim our lost innocence.”

What are your power words? Sometimes, the most powerful words are those that appear on the surface to be the gentlest.

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